I’ll grant you I was perhaps a little guilty of too much candour there on the last entry, but as I was coming out of the gloom the need for tenderness metamorphosed into the need for a shag and thoughts naturally landed on the fact that good steamy sex has been an all too infrequent visitor Chez Baron and this is a great pity. I take the point about masturbation, were I not an atheist I might see masturbation as proving the existence of God in similar logic to the Babelfish arguement, that something so mind-bogglingly useful cannot have come about by chance and therefore must have been invented deliberately QED God. I have however no desire to get myself killed on the next zebra crossing and will therefore stop at this juncture.(for the non-HHGTTG initiated it’s high time you read it, no excuses now). A last thought on the sex front -you do not actually know how long it has been since I last had sex -I just wanted to make that clear in case somebody was thinking that the poor Baron had gone without for 9 years, trust me that isn’t the case and were it to be so I would by now be in a secure mental hospital or my house-mate would be walking funny!

I don’t know why I did mention it yesterday but it gave me a feeling like mooning in public -you know you are exposing more than people wish to see but the frisson of doing so is somewhat exhilerating in a naughty sort of way! I guess I should have been a proper show-off but I don’t have the life or physique for it.

I am most chuffed at getting 2 plug’s in a week this week which isn’t bad since my blog entries this week have hardly been uplifting stuff. The Protagonist(s) and I have had a rivalry dating back to my being overthrown as the top blog-city commentor, I feel like the leader of the opposition (no, not the one in England currently, I’ll never feel like him) engaging in friendly banter but wanting my nice warm premier seat back all the time! The Protagonist can be found here Do not be surprised if you get confused reading the comments but that’s part of the fun. For anyone who has seen Battle Beyond the Stars Protagonist is like Nestor as in ‘We are Nestor’. To those of you who may point out that the top of the tree currently on the bc commentors is Pimme rest assured, the young pretender will be dealt with!!

I also got a mention from Neil Armstrong…….. let me just leave that one out there for a mo before explaining that he is not that one as the poor fella probably has to explain multiple times a day. Anyway he is currently stuck in the Fatherland, a situation not unknown to me and his blog merits a look too. Find him here and be gentle on him regarding the football it is not big or clever to mock the afflicted!

You know I sit down sometimes and think how that now that I’m over 30, and if I’m not going to be mature then there’s no hope of me ever being so, I should surely have the ability and the resilience to go back into the singles mix at some stage. Ho ho there speaks a man who hasn’t been free and single for over 10 years -and then I was young, free and single! I then wake up from this daydream and remember what it was actually like and it was shite. I hated having to try to tart myself up to an accepted norm to which I was never going to match up trying to make sure that I was wearing clothes that were ok and had had a shave and brushed my hair but most of all I hated how it made me act when I was in whatever meat market venue was the chosen one. I could never strike the middle ground, I knew that I was no catch and also no dancer so rather than look over-enthusiastic I was a bar-propper, now this did mean that I became able to handle an inordinate amount of drink but this was a bad thing because much of the time when I got quite drunk I did reasonably well mainly because I stopped thinking about it and probably looked for someone half a Bacardi Breezer away from comatose. My problem was handling rejection, yes I know Dr. Freud would be well chuffed as I’m quite certain he’d find all sorts of reasons, suffice to say rejection and I do not get along, I tend to take it very personally no matter how logical it actually seems. So you had a choice really, rejection and damn the consequences taking the view of ‘nothing ventured nothing gained’ or the self-preservationist attitude to prevent onese;f getting hurt. I do believe on balance the former is the slightly better strategy but not without its pitfalls it has the potential to be far better if things go right and far far worse if they do not. The question is do you want to live your life in grey or black and white?

The kids came back today a day early, typical in some ways that the ex brought them back tonight, the only night where I had quite a lot to do and the prospect of a lie-in in the morning, but it was special to see them again they were dead chuffed.

Other than that my house-mate is getting heavy about the bills needing to be paid and me clearing my stuff up, this house is a lot more expensive than he had previously led me to believe so it’s not been the ideal partnership. I maay be forced to look at my options which would not be ideal at this stage, I don’t know if the place I moved out of is still available and the prospect of moving back in there in time for the bloody winter doesn’t exactly fill me with glee! I am having to write him a note now outlining that there is simply no money in the kitty. As it is I am trying to methodically go thru’ my stuff and list it on ebay, if you look on ebay it’s practically all mine now! Perhaps I should just start blogging what special offers are available at the Maison de Barone Rouge! I know what the problem is it’s my choice of career I should have gone into crime, I always saw myself as being well cut out for a bit of grand larceny and you can bet your arse I wouldn’t be where I am now -it’s an all or nothing thing I’d either be a Champagne Communist (hurrah!) or a guest of Her Majesty (boo!) (For those not of this country being a ‘guest of her maj’ is a euphemism for being in jail)

Funny how when you start to pick yourself up life has a nasty habit of taking another swing at you! Fortunately it is now close enough to pay day to mean I should be able to hold things together for a bit. It does seem tho’ that each month when you think, just get thru’ this month and it’ll ease off something new comes along to put a spanner in the works. This doesn’t exactly make for an easy ride.

Song Of The Day – US3 ~ Canteloupe

Original Comments:

Rachel made this comment,
let me ask you a weird question…how long have you been an athiest? when and how did you know? well, i guess, two weird questions..
Visit me @ http://palmysinfullbloom.blog-city.com

comment added :: 26th June 2004, 05:33 GMT+01
Rachel made this comment,
the comparison of laws…perhaps…except with the ownership of a gun, there’s only a chance that the gun will degrade or despoil anyone in any way. while owning porn, somewhere, someone is being degraded, even if the participant was willing.
Visit me @ http://palmysinfullbloom.blog-city.com

comment added :: 27th June 2004, 00:27 GMT+01
protagonist made this comment,
we appreciate your plug. i suppose your description of us is better than comparing us to gollum.
how old are you? i have to wonder if there is something to the lifecourse theorists, as this half of the protagonist is also past thirty and has kids and ending a 10-year relationship.

something that goes off in us when we reach this age?

comment added :: 27th June 2004, 01:27 GMT+01
David S made this comment,
how do you know you are top commenter? I thought they tok that out of BC ages ago? or am I missing something obvious?
Visit me @ http://glasgowdave.blog-city.com

comment added :: 27th June 2004, 13:24 GMT+01